BDSM BLOG
Sex in Relationships
- Sep.01, 2023 11:26:04
- 0 Comments
"Men and women are different, it is an indisputable fact. But we are not a different species, nor aliens from a different planet. We were not born to torture each other. The nature of our interconnected differences proves that we a deep mutual need for each other".
Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modernity by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá
So, what kind of sexual relationship does it have to be in order to form a confidential relationship?
I would resist starting with the word "must". Perfectionism is irrelevant here, it is binding. In a strong couple, sex is an uncontrollable area, like a vacation. You're right there diving, swimming, and focusing on whether it pleases you, whether this photo sparks the imagination, or the next one together (wouldn't you leave a buddy on that boring canvas in the middle of the gallery?) .
Sex can be an area without familiar social patterns, and it's easy for two people to be abandoned in bed. That said, it's a safe space to experiment with 'inequality', dominance-obedience, role-playing games on nurses and doctors... sex in changing roles, curiosity, seduction, manipulation, primality Blooming with artistry.
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Focus more on pleasure than sexual independence
No matter how confident, decisive, and determined you are in life, no matter how fulfilling your career success brings you, it's the antithesis of lust. Erotica loves play and spontaneity. Porn allows you to transcend limitations in other areas of your life.
Porn is a safe path to freedom, and it can be seen in the shadow of fidelity. The imagination is freed and it is easier to accept the "you are the only one for me" limitation.
Accept your fantasy
We are all prone to fantasy. This unconscious imaginative play can tell us a lot about us, even the most intimate things. Whether we are ready for these images or not - they always serve as an invaluable source of knowledge about what drives our desires.
How to start
1. Make a list of ten pleasurable fantasies—from the simplest to the most outlandish.
2. Decide who to tell about the three of them.
3. Live out three more fantasies with your partner.
4. Write a story about two other people.
5. Ask a friend about the remaining two - aren't they close to her? After all this, you will understand that there are many more people with this fantasy than you think.
6. Find three new fantasies that excite you.
What's the point
Sexual fantasies are imaginary scenarios that easily arouse our desires. Sometimes it can be surprising and even scary to learn about the worlds of our own fantasies, because they do not fit into generally accepted frameworks of decency, but were born under the influence of our unconscious impulses.
That's why by analyzing them, we can understand ourselves better. At the same time, there is absolutely no need to put all these fantasies into practice. You can play with them in your imagination and connect your partner to them.
Even the partial inclusion of fantasy in sexual spaces can bring vibrancy and urgency to intimate relationships. It's a savory spice that sets the tone for the entire dish.
Sexual Liberation in Couples Is Being able to Hear and Express Their Desires
Remember correlations and irrelevances - you have to check. It's not that your desires are the same. Or it might just take time: If your partner rejects your fantasies, it doesn't mean he rejects you. It seems so simple, but most people don't know what they are really feeling.
Sex is not only tenderness, but also different feelings
Dependency, submission, domination, jealousy, passion, tenderness, timidity, aggression, intimacy, and fusion—anything that is alienated in everyday life can be especially attractive behind the bedroom door.
Shame and taboos are often not related to attitudes in the head but to feelings of alienation in the body. In order not to be despised by others because of their imperfect bodies, and to save their own face, women can completely refuse sex.
By the way, also a man. The partners were then given particularly strict gaze privileges. If one partner in a relationship is always picky about the other person's body, you'd better think about the future of your relationship. If you really believe it, gaining a dozen pounds will make you less attractive. But if both parties really love each other, this is certainly not the case. Don't confuse real humiliation with role-playing games.
If you are truly ashamed of your body, you have to work. External discipline of exercise and food alone, pounds on the scale, or exercise success cannot correct this.
It's always an internal breakdown. Your task is to allow yourself to experience sexual pleasure and humility. It's the same way a woman feels when she first meets a man she's sexually attracted to.
Living in harmony with your body and learning how to love the special feelings it makes is the right way to accept yourself. This is your responsibility and obligation in a successful relationship.
According to Daluse, listening to your own voice, trusting your desires, and using your imagination — that's how you gain sexual confidence.
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